Tenth Day of Christmas: “I Have My Books, and My Poetry to Protect Me”

The system I have set up to protect myself from other people works. Rarely do I find myself pulled into the drama of friendships or the difficulties associated with relationships. But it means I don’t have many close ones. I notice that while people not liking me is kind of what I expect, it still opens up the trauma that led me to the strategy of keeping distance to begin with. So, while I expect it, not being liked validates the underlying reasons for avoiding closeness. This is, I think, what makes me feel sad about the outcome.